I feel like I’m about to repeat myself but its bugging me so I’m going to say it anyway. I LOVE looking at real estate in other provinces or states even other countries, seeing how different other peoples houses and lives look. I love imagining what it would be like to be walking through a certain house as if I am purchasing it, who would be in what rooms, where the furniture would all go. I even like filling in the calculator to see how much the approx. payments would be each month. I have no idea why I like it so much because it if ever actually came down to moving away from the area I live in I would have a major anxiety attack and call the whole thing off. There is always some excuse as to why I’m unable to leave the area. Sure I could handle being with in an hour or less radius but outside of that I truly do feel like Truman I’m afraid of the water, I’m afraid of drowning.
I know there is more out there, there has to be more to life then sitting here day in and day out. I want to live somewhere warm, I want to be able to do things as a family. I want a house that’s big enough for all of us and our stuff. I want to be able to say I want to move to a completely different place and not be afraid of drowning in my own anxiety, I want to meet people and actually develop friendships and not be afraid I’m alone.
How cool would it be to be able to move to another place? I’m tired of freezing in the winter, I’m tired of listening to peoples negativity, Tired of feeling like I’m not meant to be here but I cant leave here. I know a lot of people or Facebook says I do. I know their faces, I know their names, some of them I went to school with others I worked with. But I don’t know if I can call them friends. I mean they don’t talk to me other then the odd comment or like, I can count on both hand how many of them actually talk to me in person and they are all family. to actually have someone say they know me because they went to school with me……hahahah even in school I was a loner and really didn’t have friends.
I’m so tired of seeing the exact same thing everyday, the same people that in my opinion would just as soon push into a tank full of man eating sharks if it got them a dollar. I want to move, but I don’t want to move 20 minutes up the road. I want to go somewhere I’ve never been, somewhere I can meet people and make friends and raise my family and be happy. Most of all I want to be able to do these things with out being afraid that it will fall apart and Ill have come running back like a bird that couldn’t leave the nest.
Just call me Truman……..the water is too deep.